An unplanned weekend: first water-play

July 13, 2013

This weekend per invitation we brought Taikun to visit a friend to play water with their son. Their apartment complex has a pool. Knowing Taikun may be fussing about water, we have prepared him in advance, asking would it be okay to swim at Ryan’s this weekend? As expected, “bo-ai! (I don’t want it)” was the reply. Repeated bo-ai’s after reconfirmations (or more precisely in Taiwanese, “ko-jia^n”). Recognizing he needed more time to handle new situations, we still decided to bring him there and to wing it. He needs exploring new unfamiliar things.

We arrived around 5pm, and soon two families walked to the pool, which was beside the club house just next to their apartment. We also bought Taikun a green-turtle float, with two holes in the bottom to accommodate legs when sitting in it on the water. My friend inflated the turtle float for us, and Taikun happily carried it with us to the pool.  

Upon arrival, I was surprised that nobody was using the pool—actually we were the only patrons until it closed at 7pm that night. Great—it was “reserved” for only us! Friend and his son Ryan played very happily in the water: Ryan’s swim floatie—an inflated band on his arms and chest—helped him well floated in the water. My friend shared that they have spent quite a lot of time after the pool opened. It’s really good to have a pool!

My little Taikun, as a first-timer, insisted to stay on the land for first 30 minutes, “Bo-ai!” Knowing he needed some encouragement in fun, I splashed water to him. He was excited, but later complained that his pants got wet, “Ko tâm tâm!” I explained to him that swimming is about getting wet, “siû-chúi siⁿ-sêng  tio̍h-e tâm ki ”. Further, I connected it to bathing, “Li  sé-seng-khu e  sî-chūn ma e tâm-ki, gam m-si?” (You got wet when bathing, isn’t it?). He still fussed about it, wanting his wet pants off. Without a better solution, T then removed his wet swimming pants, with only the water-proof diaper on.

I knew I had to show to him to convince him. I soon got into the water and swam between ends, demonstrating what swimming was about. Also I enticed him that his friend Ryan was in the water too.

After these efforts, finally he agreed to sit on the first step of concrete stairs where the water was 2-inch deep.  He looked really adorable kicking the water in his water-proof diaper. Bravo!

This pool, though not-standard for athletic purposes, was perfect for Taikun since it provided a shallow water area for first-time children.  Taikun stayed seated on the step, satisfactorily seeing me, my friend and his son in the water. I encouraged him to get deeper into the water by lowering a step, but he refused. He simply held his turtle float so tightly, enjoying the scene he never saw before.

I managed to take some time swimming for several rounds, since I haven’t exercised at all for months. While his turtle float accidentally drifted away, when getting it back I again encouraged him to get in to the water by sitting in it. “Bo-ai!” was his responses. I further came up with new stimuli—pushing water to him as waves. He didn’t seem to like it. He definitely needs more time for this.

Later a neighbor of my friend joined us with her son Austin. Her son brought in a water noodle that blasts water (or called  liquidatior or blaster). So, all people took turns playing with this water blaster into a water fight. Everybody had fun!

After the pool closed, we had dinner at friends—they prepared cold noodle in sesame paste. Pretty refreshing during this humid summertime. After the dinner, it’s getting dark. Taikun joined his Ryan and Austin for rides in their apartment community. While Ryan and Austin rode kid bikes, Taikun was given an electric car—which was another first-time experience for him. Much to my surprise shortly after mounting on it he drove it well. Of course, he didn’t know how to maneuver it by turning the wheel—I stayed with him all the way to help his directions. I explained to him that he needed to turn the wheel in order not to bump into the curb, people or any parked vehicle. Six adults—me, T, Ryan’s parents, and Austin’s Mom and grandma—strolled with three kids for several rounds in their apartment complex. Amid fireflies (yes, Taikun, hóe-kim-ko), we had a pleasant walk in the evening.

July 14, 2013

Next day was a scorching Sunday with temperature peaking at 90s. At home Taikun fretted, messing up with whatever he saw—he was really bored. He insisted to open the fridge for something not allowed, and then tossed something from table and refused to pick it up. Successive rule violations triggered a time-out. When he was placed on the stairs, Taikun started to cry, no, soon becoming screams. It sound the end of  the world, and I couldn't help doubt if what I was doing something wrong. After 5-minute of turmoil, I calmed him down and hugged him, reiterating him what were violated. Still with tears in eyes, he understood my preach, verbally okaying not to do those again.

To get a way out, T then proposed to visit a pool nearby due to yesterday’s water inspiration. Despite there appears to have several choices in the city, I proposed that we should know if there is a shallow-water area before we actually enter paying for it. According to yesterdays’ experiences, he would give a water facility a try if the water is simply 2-3 inch deep, and would be scared off if deeper.

We also stopped by a store giving a one-day 20%-off for all items, although there was nothing on the wishlist in particular. We ended up with getting a beach ball, which is a must have for boys. He needs to develop the athletic skill from balls---tossing, catching, or simply patting. Though not particularly athletic, I think as a father I need to get him one. T also got some water pitchers—though they looked detergent or bleach in appearance.

On the other hand, I came across a snack I loved as a kid. It was called “Tai-food sandwich crackers", which were two pieces of thin rectangle crackers with a cream sandwiched in between. I introduced it to Taikun as “Papa  sè-hàn-sî-chūn e  piáⁿ”. He was interested, and finished several in the car.

After missing it for so many years, it was really a surprise. Later from Internet on I realized this is actually British, called “Custard cream biscuits” there.  (It also came to me that the word biscuit means different in America and in UK.) Even in Taiwan this kind of snack was already discoutinued: I remembered this sandwich biscuit was one of the staple sweet stuffs I loved, with either cream-flavored or chocolate flavored sandwich filling.  

We finally arrived at a pool which actually pretty close to the new home. While T and Taikun staying in the car, I first detoured to the side of the pool to see if it has any shallow-water area for Taikun. Unfortunately this was a typical pool, with 3-ft the shallowest and 8-ft the deepest, with usual stainless steel ladders down to the water. Without a shallow-water area, this place won’t work for Taikun. On the other hand, Taikun, staying in the car when I investigated the pool, also complained about unkemptness of the pool: “ lah-sap!” as he saw litters and debris on the grounds. Are you a neat freak, A-kun?

Disappointed, we shifted to Bowdoin Park to try our luck. We had all water gears in place and it’d be wasteful to call it a day returning home now. When getting there, the park was packed, despite the afternoon burning heat and capturing humidity. We quickly prepared Taikun and walked him to the waterplay, where nozzles sprayed or jetted the water into the air as a fountain or water mist. Lots of kids enjoyed it and their parents stood aside. I. too, got into the water first, hoping to encourage Taikun to get in to have a try. Again, after repeated “Bo-ai!”, our visit of Bowdoin park ended because it was even impossible to try other non-water play facilities (like swing or slides nearby) due to the high temperature.

Afterwards, the only place left to hang out was the shopping mall with air conditioning. We also picked some Bourbon chicken—the dish I love due to its smokey flavor. (Though it coming from burned fat and meat which may lead to cancer, I still couldn’t resist the temptation. Maybe it’s fine as long as not eating it every day.) And ended our first outing after the moving—which was actually not-planned in advance.

What a weekend! Though not on par with what I had expected, Taikun’s progress was satisfactory since at least he made a huge stride out: into the water. That’s a huge step for him. Not to mention the chance to associate with other kids riding toy cars in the neighborhood. 

We are responsible for memories he can recollect after he grows up. Grow up happily, Taikun.

Nomad life: moving again

After new place’s closing, we started to look for a mover. But gradually, we realized that it’s already late. We were told by many movers to schedule into mid-July for the moving date due to the peak season. 

After many desperate phonecalls, finally we got a manager of a mover stopping by for a quote for a moving date of July 1 they okayed. Upon receiving the quote, I followed up with some more additional questions regarding charges and if there was anything not included in the quote to avoid surprises.  After a long wait, however, I got a cold response in the e-mail that said moving date of July 1 was already booked by another employee in her office so July 1 is no longer available. “We do not reserve a date—it’s first-come, first-serve based,” excused this “manager.”

We were very angry, feeling we were duped as the mover could back out anytime. We had worked hopefully with a potential mover and everything ended up in vain. However, the anger was soon replaced by frustration. Their back-out ruined the entire moving plan—and now everything was back to the drawing table. Not to mention that T had promised to the landlord that we will return the current place on July 3^rd the latest. What to do with it?

T then quickly decided that we should move on our own, and urged to accept it. This will be a daunting job. To be honest, I was very very reluctant to do it on my own, and my mood plummeted—how possibly this would be a project that we can manage entirely on our own?

This frustration was well grounded based on prior experiences from across the river to here in last winter. It was a snowy day and it was a DIY---I rented the truck and finished all the uploading and downloading in a day. My entire body sored for a week afterwards, the huge distress was unbelievable. 

Anyway, the cruel reality forced me to face it since we had no other options, as T reflected. To be safe, I reserved a 16-foot truck for 4 days—I had hoped to shorten the rent period but simply couldn’t since all larger trucks had been out, and 16-foot was the largest available. 

We managed to upload and download two trucks in first two days. However, piano has been a big worry since it was 500 pounds. Though T has made some efforts to research the possibilities (say buying professional moving supplies like dolly), the situation has push us to resort it to professionals for help. While talking with a mover who later responded to us that he couldn’t move us on July 1^st, he referred us to check the possibilities of a piano store in downtown P. I called on Friday, and was asked if I was available  that very afternoon for moving the piano. It couldn’t be better, I thought. After the movers finished the moving, T suggested if they were interested in helping to move. They agreed and stopped by the old  place to look---first they said $250 for moving major bulky items. With everybody getting tired for moving on our own, T also asked  how much they would charge if they move everything. They doubled the price to $500.

Without more information about the reputation of these two workers, I okayed it since everybody was exhausted. If spending some money could tide us over the difficulty, I was willing to bear some risk to hire helpers. Since the deal was they simply upload and download and I still did the driving, I felt better since I had secured the safety of the household properties. Rouge movers, who bid placed lowball bid to get the business and then skyrocketed charges upon arriving destination, won’t be the case here—they  won’t have my property as the hostage. Not to mention that these people had been working for a piano store, with the necessary reference assuring the basic reputation we need. At least it’s not from nowhere that there is no information  at all for their service quality. 

Later the situation proved this was a correct decision. Having helpers to move greatly reduced our stress and also allowed us to concentrate on things  that really needed us—say packing fragile items and more importantly, to clean the old place so that we could return it to the landlord as soon as possible  to avoid unnecessary rent charges, albeit pro-rated, and possibly deposit reduction. I was happy that I took some risks hiring these people.

Here is a chronicle of the moving:

June 26 (Wed): Despite having estimated the job, the mover backed out promised move-day on July 1st when we followed up. Decided to move on our own instead, and booked a 16-ft truck.

June 27 (Thu): Self-move day: Got the truck at 10:30am. A full truck load by self. Growing anxiety about how to move the piano.

June 28 (Fri): Through referrals, connected to a piano company (Vicintore) in the morning. Had the piano moved at 1:30pm—Great relief! Contacted and confirmed the very same movers to help. Also a full truck load by self. Without my consent T cancelled J’s coming to help, which was scheduled earlier. 

June 29 (Sat) Helpers showed up at 2:30pm and finished a truck load at 6:30pm.

June 30 (Sun): Helpers showed up at 10am and finished a truck load at 2:30pm. Later, a “thin” truck load afterwards.

July 1 (Mon): Returned the truck at 8am. Finished emptying and cleaning old place. Appointment made with landlord to return the house.

Total: 4.5 loads of 16-ft truck.

Indepedence Day Lessons

July 3

The night before the Independence Day, I was busying setting up my study on the second floor. While moving is being recognized as one of the most stressful events in people’s life, there were a lot things needed to be renewed (say insurances) for the year. Since these chores didn’t go smoothly as expected, I was very fretted. 

At this very time, Taikun entered my study probing items on my desk.  

Getting fussed, I demanded, “No, A-kun, khì. M-thang chhit-thô góa ê mi̍h-kiāⁿ.”(No, A-kun, Go. Don’t play with my stuff.)

He didn’t listen to me, insisting touching more objects, until a computer router finally dropped from my desk.
A big bang triggered my anger. “A-kun,” I growled, “A-KUN!”

A silence froze the situation: I was stunned, beginning to realize that was probably the largest volume used in my life.   

He was scared and started to cry. A and T ran upstairs to check what happened, and brought him away.

I could hear him sobbing downstairs when A tried to comfort him--He looked so poor. I was astonished---was I too harsh to him? I started to regret about what I scolded him that way.

After 30 minutes I went downstairs to refill iced tea, and checked remotely how he was doing. He had stopped sobbing, playing on the coach with A.  A helped mediate the situation, encouraging him to apologize.

He then, “Papa sit-lé. Goa beh go chhit-thô  lí  ê chia̍h-thâu-lō ê mi̍h-kiāⁿ lo.” (Dad, sorry. I won’t play with your work stuff any more.)
I was touched. I asked him over, “lâi chia, Papa phō.” (Come here, let papa hug you).  

I knelt down to his height, holding him so tightly for a minute I guessed.

This is my only son, most beloved one. “Papa ài  li o (Papa loves you),” my tears almost dropped.  

He continued, “góa beh go the̍h li ê mi̍h-kiāⁿ lo (I won’t take your stuffs any more)”.

Well, the “father-and-son” episode ended temporarily for the night.

July 4.  Next morning, at 8:30am, I woke up and walked into his room checking him up. He opened eyes,  and automatically continued,  

“Papa gâu-chá. Goa bē  koh chhit-thô lí  ê mi̍h-kiāⁿ (Papa good morning. I won’t play your stuffs any more)”

I was a bit surprised---Definitely he was mindful about what learned last night. While I’d say I was content when hearing he said this, I felt he is somehow getting matured, or “socially sophisticated” because of this.

While I am in my study, he came upstairs to call me to breakfast: “góa sī-m̄-sī ē-sái  lip-lâi lí chò khang-khòe ê só-chāi? Goa bē  koh theh lí ê mih-kiāⁿ lo” (Can I enter the place you work? I won’t play your stuffs any more.)

I am happy to allow him in this time. Come to enjoy your Independence Day from my study. 

Night: Brought all family members to see firework on Hudson River. Though official site was at Waryas Park, I chose Kaal Rock Park--a bit southern, but should be much nicer because of less crowd.

Official starting time was about 9:00pm and we arrived KR Park pretty late--around 9pm. However, there were still parking available on the street! Walked about 5 minutes on the streets before entering KR park, only to find most spectators parked their park right inside the park. Gee. 

This location is okay--at least it has the Mid-Hudson Bridge as the background. I should have brought my tripod--at least it'll give better static shot for the family. Because of move, I couldn't find it before departure. (Next time gotta get better prepared.) 

Entire show lasted  about 20 minutes. KR park was a bit distant from the launching location which was on a barge on the Hudson River, and to be honest the size of the firework tended to be on small side, not as impressive as previous firesworks I had seen before. I remembered one year I saw fireworks at the top floor of Prudential Building  in Boston, which was much larger than this. 

Anyway this is the first experience for Taikun---he was a bit scared in the beginning. However, since T's comforting and explanation, he was getting used to it. Taikun has a high perception capability of anything beautiful--he had wowed over good-looking craft in progress when arriving daycare. So I guessed in this first experience despite the firework noise was daunting, he was attracted to it due to their beauty.

Hope he grows a lot with this first experience. A-kun, have a colorful wonderful life!

FInal moments of Move

Last day of old place occupancy: June 30 2013

After helpers finished their two-load work (upload and download), we paid them $450. But I still have one truck load: this time some fragile items, including a lawn mower and some bed boards that helpers failed to include their two trips due to capacity limit of the truck. 

A thin layer gradually filled the truck. Plus, a full load on the SUV for fragile kitchen items.

After dinner, A and T went back to clean the old place. At the new place, I was left with a load’s items, and the responsibility to take care of Taikun. He had felt asleep around 4:30pm in the car when coming to new place and now was still sleeping. Since this was the only uninterrupted time, I had to start unload early and, working very hard--Hopefully to finish all unloading before he awoke. 

These several days the weather were unstable—with heavy rain. I started unloading around 7pm. Despite technically the items appeared “thin” on the truck, I was soaked in the rain. I was hoping to grasp the chance when the rain stopped, but technically it was hard to get a time when the rain was completely off.  

When I was busying with items in-and-out, Taikun woke up around 7:45pm, shouting “A-po, A-po!” I immediately dashed upstairs to his side, explaining to him that Mama and A-po were away, cleaning at the old place.  I then pointed to him to see my messy look (sweat + soaked), “koh  tán papa  cha̍p-ji hun-cheng, ho-bo? (Wait Papa for 20 more minutes, okay?)” Still lying on bed, in the beginning he didn’t fully understand what I meant since not yet fully awake. After I repeated the explanation he seemed to understand, agreeing to stay on bed for 20 more minutes, saying “ho (Okay)”.

Downpour went on. I managed to speed up the project—the last few items seemed endless. The mower needed to be pulled all the way from the front to the back, through the uneven brick path to the shed. It’s pretty hard to finish it in the rain. Two air conditioners—which T insisted to buy and install in the old place during the very last few days of occupancy—needed special attention when they were dropped.

Anyway, I finished the project, and was so happy to slam the door of the truck. When I showed up again in front of Taikun, he was fully awake, rolling and turning with his beloved pick bunny. I then explained to him I need to take a bath and then got into the bathroom. He understood what I said.

I was soaked and dirty—I took a quick shower anyway despite of knowing there were no clean clothes to put on. Then I had to use a towel to serve a temporary “cloth” to cover myself. Taikun was amused—since this is a rare experience that A and T was away and he spent time alone with me. A Papa in almost-nude mode, haha.

We played a while on his bed and he okayed my proposal to go downstairs to eat. I, clad only with a bath towel, prepared his food in the kitchen: yogurt, with a piece of Italian shortbread cookie covered with chocolate as the reward. He had some water. He refused cheese. We played ice cubes, “chiok beng e! (So icy cold!)”, he surprised. 

Since the first floor was packed with items to the extent that there was no space to turn-around, we returned second floor which remained relative empty for Taikun. He checked each room and got amused at the ceiling fans. We returned to his bed looking outside through windows. Last night when I did his bedtime, he spotted “hóe-kim-ko! (firefly)!”outside. Tonight, I encouraged him to count the lighted windows from neighboring houses. We didn’t see any fireflies tonight—perhaps due to heavy rain.

At 9:30pm it approached his sleep time as he started to yawn. We returned first floor for some water, and I fed him some oatmeal. He had several coarse and wet coughs, pointing to his neck, saying “chia ē  thiàⁿ (it hurts here).” Seriously I check his neck--the skin looked okay. So I guessed he had a soar throat. He has been coughing very badly for a couple of days and I will report the situation to A and T to see if there is a need to visit a doctor.

There were still several rituals for me to finish. After the oatmeal, it’s time for a bath. First it’s teeth brushing. He has been refusing to use toothpaste at all probably for its flavor. So a toothbrush was used without anything on it, simply after a dip in the water at best. (So is this effective in fighting cavity?). For bath, he was still concerned with the showerhead (he didn’t seem to like it). Instead he used a cup to get the water from the tap, and poured it to himself. He giggled and had fun.

Finally, the bedtime—much to my surprise he felt asleep around 10:30pm. He re-slept after such a short period of time. After getting out of Taikun bedroom, A and T returned with a full load of SUV. I worked with them to unload all items again, until calling it a day around midnight. Basically the moving was almost completed—and tomorrow we will visit the old place to finalize it, before T will have an appointment with the landlord at the old place at 4pm. 

July 1, 2013: Thanks to A and T’s hard work, we got the full deposit back!