Meeting for Taikun's Development

Today, it’s the time to meet Debby for newest developments of Taikun. (For last review, See Nov 19 2012 Taikun Progress Review). First, much to our surprise, Debby was excited about superior capability Taikun demonstrated in self-help. He can zip the jacket, and take off and put on clothes of himself. He can wipe nose himself. He can put things into garbage can himself. Also he can pick things in the classroom when asked to. These self-help skills, according to Debby, are not yet seen in many of other peer kids in his grasshopper classroom. She is excited. 

Second, another surprise: Debby dubbed him as a “social butterfly” (really?!) since he easily mingles with both boys and girls. When arriving at daycare, he enjoys being in the group immediately. Now he belongs to a “Running Group”---  the individual who are always running, jumping, and active--- with other members of Doltic, Maddn, Christopher, and Jaddn. 

Third, Debby praised his progress in eating development. In contrast to simply gagging, choking, or outright rejection over the table for anything when he first joined in this daycare, now Taikun is eating almost “everything.”  For meals, different dishes are served on only “one” paper plate, and one spoon/fork is provided. The paper plate is the round type, not the fancy type with several partitions as we have used at home. For example, he loves to dip the pasta in the sauce (really?)

Actually, I almost cannot believe what we heard--- Debby was talking about a completely different person—not the Taikun we know at home. As we shared with Debby, Taikun needs one container for a dish, and ends up with multiple ones for a meal. Also, he needs many spoons/ forks  (records: 7) for a meal since he insists get a new one after each time an utensil is used, becoming “dirty”. Debby was surprised too, and laughingly commented that “he played us-- parents.” 

For mimicking and following others (as commented in last review Nov 19 2012), he appears to cut back on that a little, but he still observes other people and follow them a lot. Debby commented that now, she still hopes Taikun is able to make more independent choices.   

Moreover, he now knows how to push and test limits of adults. Debby shared some conversation:

“Do you understand my word?” “Yes, Debby.”

“Don’t follow others [misbehavior] since that will bring you trouble.” “Yes, Debby.”

He actually knows what he is doing—Debby noted that Taikun would furtively sideway peek at her when doing something not allowed, if not “bad.” Obviously, he recognized it.  We all cracked up.

Also, he is good at motor skills. As most boys do, he shows intense interest to insects that move—say ants). He still hammer-grips a pen/ pencil/ crayon for writing, which is actually not a correct way of gripping. He is good at building blocks using Lego/ Duplo, say castles or towers.

He loves music (this matches what we recognizes home). He loves being in a group (this we are sure when he is with the family members). We are happy for these remarks. 

Language-wise, Taikun understands three-sentence orders well, and can follow them: “Go to cubby. Put on jacket. Stand by the door.”  However, his English is “clipped” ----not as elaborated as his native-speaker peers, but enough to get his points or ideas crossed.  Debby used an example: he can say “I put the book away” while other peers can say “I took the book on the shelve to the table.”

I have provided a table for how to pronounce one to ten in Taiwanese to Debby. After each counting in group, when Debby asked if everybody was read fine, Taikun responded, "good." 

Taikun, just like at home, is very curious and is constantly observing the surroundings. Debby confirmed Taikun is easily distracted: At daycare, when Debby was changing his diaper, he also turned his head glancing around, asking “Where’d Hollie [the assistant caregiver to Debby] go?” “What’s that over there?” However, his distractibility is not to the extent of ADHD. Debby said that Taikun focuses well on things he likes, such as on doing craft/ arts, reading a book, or group story-telling time. An ADHD kid, however, would simply look at windows and never pay attention to the ongoing event, or simply giggling on his/her own. Debby concluded that Taikun, as a multi-language child, needs to observe a lot (multi-tasking, I guess?) especially for new situations. It’s simply a mechanism for learning for him, concluded by Debby.

However, our little social butterfly seems only fly among people he is familiar with, not with strangers.   We shared with Debby about “ There are people!” episodes in park when he sees people on the playing scene: Taikun insists to monopolize the playing facility on his own for the entire time, and will be upset and stop playing if anybody arrives. Taikun refused to play in the park if there are already other people there when we arrive. Or, he would stop playing on the sets if any visitor joins in later using the facility, saying either slide or swing. 

Debby suggested a strategy we may want to try: we can say hello to other parents (e.g., introducing ourselves and “what’s the age of the kids”) to break the ice with strangers first. This would serve as a way to pave the road for him to overcome the fear/ discomfort dealing with people unfamiliar with. This is a good suggestion and we would try—since actually T has once brought Taikun to a big park in Rhinebeck when an Indian mother and her child was there. Taikun was intimated at first, refusing to play at all. However, after T talked with that mother, Taikun became much relaxed, willing with play despite the presence of a strangers.

Debby also  comments a lot these are actually Taikun’s personality. Slow into a situation is simply what he is—he is an observer.

Finally we reviewed some follow-up, such as potty training. While Taikun is still on diaper at all times, we have anecdotal success (1-2 times) using regular toilet. Debby suggested we commit a whole weekend at home and insist him to sit on the toilet for every half an hour for the needed training. Simply take him to the toilet and show him some good-looking underwear he can dream of, and use it to encourage him to try. In our previous attempts, he became upset easily on the toilet, and each trial lasted for only several minutes. Maybe we can commit a whole weekend---say a rainy one that we cannot even go to the park at all—for this to see how it goes. Debby says, if we are lucky just as in some cases, a kid can be fully potty trained after a weekend of commitment.  

Also, Taikun is going to another class-Scout in coming September. He will go there along with several peers—Jaddn, Maddn, Cleo, etc. Scout class has an assistant Dan who is an expertise for physical active activities. Debby believes Taikun will love there.

A lot surprise for this meeting: we feel Debby is talking about a different person, not Taikun. Say these titles at school: social butterfly, above-peer self-help capability, and improved eating habit. At home, what we observed is quite different, if not totally on the opposite side: shy and reluctant to play in the park with stranger presence, uncooperative when being un/dressed for bath or for bed or for school, and insistence using multiple containers and utensils for meals. Anyway, this are facets of Taikun, and we will need to follow all these developments closely.

Finally, Debby praised Taikun, saying we should feel proud of having such a great boy. We appreciated that we should attribute this to her care.

Some pictures for disobedient Taikun: